How Do We Solve Them?
We enjoy our friends, but there may be times when problems arise. How do we cope with the difficulties these create?
Easy: What if a friend is angry with us for some lapse on our part? We apologize.
Hard: What if we feel that a friend is angry at us, when actually, we are projecting onto them some anger that we feel (either at them or at some unrelated situation)? If we don't understand that the anger is coming from us, how can we possibly solve this problem?
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Easy: What if a friend asks us for some kind of help that we don't want to give? We can gently explain that we aren't able to do that for them.
Hard: What if a friend who loses a relationship becomes increasingly needy toward us? The friend views us as a replacement for the person they had previously depended on excessively. We can't allow ourselves to take on that burden, but how do we handle this with the friend?
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Easy: What if a friend boasts about a success, such as a promotion, that we haven't yet achieved? We may privately feel disappointment that we haven't yet received that kind of promotion, and perhaps a little resentment at their boasting; but we congratulate them.
Hard: What if, after we achieve a success that the friend has not yet achieved, that friend develops a competitive attitude toward us? It's annoying, but is it harmful? Are we comfortable accepting their new attitude, or do we want to confront them about it? And would a confrontation make them feel even worse? What do we do?
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Easy: What if you and your friend enjoy complaining together about some difficult conditions at your shared workplace? Just enjoy your shared venting.
Hard: What if you realize that complaining about conditions at work isn't solving the problem of the unsatisfactory conditions, and you decide to take action to improve them, but your friend prefers to just keep on complaining? And you notice that she complains about everything. You realize that you have outgrown her. Do you want to end this relationship? Can you disentangle yourself in a way that isn't hurtful? How will you do it?
An Inner Guide Can Help
We can handle the problems that are easy to solve, but what about the hard ones? An Inner Guide can help. It has access to our entire memory bank and all of our subliminal perceptions. It can use these qualities to assess the situation accurately and determine the best response.
If you don't yet have an Inner Guide, you can acquire one here: https://emotionalcomfort.com/blog/post/you-can-acquire-an-inner-guide-part-4
