Are You Extra Busy?
Are you bombarded, as I am, with extra stuff to do as the holidays approach? Do you need to choose, buy, write, and send holiday cards? Choose, buy, and wrap gifts? And in some instances, ship them? What about holiday decorations and food? Do these activities also cause financial stress? Parties and religious events? Helping the kids get to their parties and religious events? And in my case, the tasks include making some of the gifts I give, because I like to do that.
Or Are You Less Busy Than You Would Like to Be?
For some of you, the holiday season brings grief at previous losses. And sometimes those losses result in too much aloneness, leading to feelings of gloom and sorrow. No love and presents to give to or receive from important people now gone, whether by passing away or alienation.
Specific Dilemmas
- Choosing gifts: how do you find something for someone who seems to have everything? Or, you think of a possible gift but don't know whether the recipient would like it.
- Dealing with other people: When friends and relatives get together, there may be complicated feelings between you and another person. Does he criticize? Proselytize? Rant and rave?
- Conflicts with Your Schedule? I love the New Yorker cartoon in which a woman is looking into a three-way mirror in her bathroom and saying, "O.K., you two. Clean up the house and do the laundry while I take the kids to school!"
How Can an Inner Guide Help?
When I don't know whether a gift would be enjoyed, I can expect my Inner Guide to help. I thought of a neat gift that I wanted to give a couple, knowing that they already had one (in a different style), and unsure whether they would prefer the new style that I had in mind. What if they preferred the style they already had? A solution came into my awareness (from my Inner Guide). I decided to give it to them, but I wrote an accompanying note describing an argument between Santa Claus and Mrs. Claus, in which she was sure they would prefer the new style. But Santa was dubious. If my friends didn't like the gift, they could at least get a laugh at the note and my way of absolving myself from blame. (Thanks, Inner Guide!)
If you are concerned about interacting with friends and relatives whose opinions and comments might destroy the good feeling of the holidays, you can simply refrain from being drawn into arguments with them. I have relatives whose political opinions are the polar opposite of mine, and they like to inform me that their views on various issues are correct. When they talk, my Inner Guide gently holds me back from arguing with them. I just listen, because I want to understand why they feel the way they do. And I don't want to destroy our otherwise festive mood.
If you are time-management challenged, your Inner Guide will help you, effortlessly and without regret, eliminate enough of your least important tasks so that you no longer have too much to do. As I make my gifts, my mind thinks of more and more additions and elaborations I could add, but my Inner Guide causes me to realize, painlessly, that enough is enough.
And if you have losses, you will not feel alone because you will sense the presence of your inner companion: your Inner Guide.
Your Inner Guide will help you with all of the holiday season's challenges. If you do not yet have an Inner Guide, you can acquire one here: https://emotionalcomfort.com/blog/post/you-can-acquire-an-inner-guide-part-4
