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Do You Ever Feel Stupid?
Do you ever feel stupid when you make a mistake? Or conjure up an exaggerated notion of negative consequences? Where are such thoughts coming from?
There are many possible explanations for making a mistake but being "stupid" is not one of them. (Sometimes lack of knowledge, perhaps, but this is not the same as stupidity.) The notion that one is stupid can occur for a couple of reasons, both resulting from having been called stupid in the past. These experiences most often begin in childhood.
Origins In Childhood
If a child who is called stupid believes it, then his mental apparatus forms a pathway consisting of all the experiences of having been called stupid, including his own self-perception that he is so. Then, when he makes mistakes, that mental pathway will chime in with the thought that he is stupid.
If a child who is called stupid doesn't believe it, he nevertheless internalizes the image of the parent or other authority figure who tells him that he is. These images form their own pathway and, when mistakes occur, that pathway will criticize him.
Understanding Helps
Either way, the individual is usually unaware that a specific pathway is causing him to feel stupid; a pathway that is separate from his adult sense of identity. If you sometimes have this experience, it will be helpful to realize that your feeling of stupidity is coming either from a young pathway or a pathway consisting of an internalization of someone else. Neither is a central part of who you are today.
