Does Anything Get in the Way?
Yesterday was "Giving Tuesday." Many of us were bombarded with requests from a variety of organizations to give money. How did we feel about that? Did we find it annoying? Did we think we should give but felt overwhelmed by the number of requests? Do we know how best to choose who we want to give to? And are we able to enjoy it?
Giving Freely Begins Early
From a very young age children have an empathic capacity that enables them to detect another’s need, and they are capable of sharing. If they do so they feel pleasure because they then enjoy the other’s relief and happiness, and the feeling of mutual closeness. But as they grow, various experiences may compromise their ability to give freely.
Problems with Giving
Children who don't experience enough love feel that they don't have enough for themselves, let alone giving to others. But they may feel compelled to give nevertheless, for a variety of reasons. If they were raised by a demanding parent, they may have chosen to comply and give rather than experience the criticism for not having given. Some children have been taught, either by a parent or by their culture, that they must give in order to be a good person. Some may give to assuage feelings of guilt.
Some may give to others in order to give vicariously to themselves. This can happen as a way of meeting their own unmet needs, or if they have been taught that it isn't right to give to themselves. In all these instances, the giving isn't done freely; it is done in an attempt to solve a problem. And it doesn't produce the pleasure that giving freely does.
An Inner Guide Can Help
I have mentioned the Inner Guide in previous blogs. It is a special mental pathway that can easily be created, and with the regular practice of self-hypnosis (which is identical to certain forms of meditation) you can enable your Inner Guide to end discomforts and solve problems (even the problems that you don't realize you have because you consider them "givens").
People who can't give freely don't realize what they are missing, or how to acquire it. But an Inner Guide can help you learn whether you have trouble giving freely and if so, how to solve that problem. Then you will have a new source of pleasure.
The course, Achieving Emotional Comfort®, that shows you how to create your own Inner Guide, is now available. It can be found at: go.emotionalcomfort.com/getcourse
