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What Causes Perfectionism?
Some people fall victim to it only occasionally but for others perfectionism becomes a habit and can be very limiting. It may develop as a response to parental demands for perfection. It may stem from a wish to demonstrate competence or to receive praise. It may be driven by an attempt to best another person or prevail in a competition. Some use it as a mechanism to try to maintain control when their surroundings seem formless or chaotic. And it may be a surreptitious way of procrastinating.
The Effects of Perfectionism
Trying to do something perfectly will delay or preclude finishing it, and cause wasted time and energy. That wasted time will eat into your productivity at work and may also cause problems with co-workers. It can rob you of time with your family and friends. It may even alienate them. Although a perfectionist hopes that by being perfect she can keep stress at bay, the fact that she rarely achieves it merely adds more stress.
How to Deal with Perfectionism
If you are a perfectionist, you may not even realize it because it is one of those habits that feels like a given. But you may be made aware of it by relatives or friends who see it more clearly than you do. And its increasing burden may call your attention to it. My complimentary Tool can help. In Step 3, instead of wishing to feel peaceful and calm, wish to be free of the need to be perfect. Once you have entered the self-hypnotic state, you are free to think about whatever you want.
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